Happy New Year! That phrase can hit people so differently, but by definition of the Gregorian Calander 1/1 reflects a new year and perceived new beginning. I don’t know how you feel on New Years, but I typically feel exhausted, unhealthy and even a little down after the rush of holidays consisting of lots of family, friends, eating and traveling. While I do not practice New Year’s resolutions, because I tend not to keep them, I do lean on a few consistent disciplines that seem to get me through the holidays and high and lows of life.

December is always a very busy month of celebration in our household. My wife and I celebrate our “anniversaries” (I know, plural, I will explain), we have the Christmas holiday, my older son’s birthday and then, of course, New Year’s. The month of December was not always a time of celebration for me because there was a time in which Nicole, and I were separated for several years. As a result, every year around the time of our anniversary there were feelings of deep sadness, disappointment and even anger and resentment. Happily, and amazingly, we were able to reconcile our marriage through a tremendous amount of work, dedication, faith and trust. This led to us reaffirming our vows on Christmas Eve in 2019, therefore creating our second anniversary date and a new beginning.

I am a firm believer that trials and adversity can be an opportunity to create life-changing, positive outcomes. Those years for me were by far the most difficult years of my life. But I am able to look back in hindsight and see the amount of personal growth I experienced during that time that has led me to be a better husband, father, friend, co-worker and leader. While noone wants to experience adversity, it’s going to happen in life and how you respond determines how you grow.

Things I learned through my experience:

1. Taking care of your mind and spirit is critical, you cannot operate and interact effectively with others if you are not well on the inside. While I always had a strong faith, I needed a therapist to help me sort through many of my internal issues that were contributory to our separation. I still utilize that very same therapist today to help keep me in check.
2. Learning the importance of practicing gratitude. I cannot think of too many things more difficult than finding gratitude when you are in incredibly adverse situations, but there is always something to be thankful for that can fuel your mind and spirit. I take a few moments each night before bed identifying and acknowledging three things I am grateful for that happened that day.
3. The art of forgiveness is essential to not only maintaining healthy relationships, but more importantly helping you maintain a healthy mind, body and soul. Nothing can rip you apart more both physically and mentally than being resentful. Life is too short, let it go!
4. Lastly, and very important for me is physical activity. I’ve been in sports all my life and operate more balanced when I am able to exercise and spark my endorphin levels. My intensity levels have shifted over the years from heavy weight training and CrossFit to the Peloton and what I call “Old man Crossfit.” As an aside, to keep me accountable, I literally have placed my Peloton in my office, so I have a visual reminder every day of my need to exercise.

Here are a couple additional “quick hitters” that I try to follow to help contribute to a balanced mind, body and soul. I don’t watch the news, I simply check the news once a day online. I listen to soothing and encouraging music throughout my day. I tell my wife and kids I love them every single time I have the chance.